7/26/2009

Still bitching...

“When a man gives his opinion he's a man. When a woman gives her opinion she's a bitch.” Bette Davis


“Just because I have my standards, they think I'm a bitch” Diana Ross



After three months and turning thirty at the same time, I can say I have changed a lot but not enough to make me stop bitching my way through life. Experiences made me tough, wisdom gave me strength and people external to my inner circle made me bitchy. (yeah you heard me, you know who you people are...

When I was in high school my mother told me my idealism will either kill me or it'll kill people... Yet I don't see any killings yet, well not at the moment though but hey I saw some of my dreams and wishes die slowly... And yes, if bitchy remarks can kill, I see a lot of dead people already which the world can do without.

Looking back I know I have become less of a bitch than I was way way back before... (do I hear some objections? lol) But yeah I have become a softy, must be age or must be that I am tired already that I just choose to ignore ignoramus people (ignoramus is to ignore as to accept the fact that some people who calls for attention are better off being ignored so as not to give in to their addiction for attention).

Hey, I'm not being a pessimist here. To people who do not know me, they will not understand what I am saying here and would even think that "yeah, she is a bitch." Society dictates too much about what a person should be and shouldn't be. Some people would call you names and yet fails to see their big egos. Oh well... life is just like that...

Where 'am I going with this? nowhere... I feel like bitching away... there are days when you just want to run away from everything and not look back... I am in that mode right now... I'm so looking forward to the next few months when I can actually put into practice this "running away mode."

4/14/2009

Mid-life bitching

We all have problems of our own and most of the time we spend procrastinating about things that literally concerns our well being. And then some people will tell you that you should focus on the good side, count your blessings, there are bigger problems happening around the world and so your problems are what... mere "subconscious dramas" (quoted from a great friend)... But heck! this is my world, my life and my own problems. How I deal with it is my business. Pssh*t let me start all over again, for a more positive reflection...

Okay so after several minutes of soul searching I can not find any positive energy in me. And so my message remains the same. It's my life, accept it or live me alone. If you want to empathize with me, don't give me inspirational craps, I might as well hear that yes indeed the world is full of greedy idiots and that no I can not really do anything about it... because at the end of the day the world is still compose of individuals, with their own dreams, own problems and own lives to live. But of course there is still hope, but that is, if we find some common goals to make this a better world but then again (whew) we still have to live our lives and not be forced to live it according to others.

And as for me, this is my life and I will live it the way I want (Read: yeah right, easier said than done, might as well go up the mountains and vanish) as long as I am not hurting or causing any human rights violations to others. For now I will focus on my world. Call it selfish, I don't give a d*mn, it's been too long since I focused on my SELF. I need this now more than ever, get it?