Its 2007, first day at work and I feel so disoriented... Mixed feelings ika nga. There is this feeling of not wanting to go back to what I was and where I was in 2006 and yet circumstances will not allow me to start a fresh. I can only wish for it but thats not being practical and you know you need to be practical to keep sane. Angst ba? Hindi naman just some reflections...
The last two weeks I decided not to do any work or study at all. (yeah I know my deadline ako sa school...) I thought maybe if I leave everything behind muna and just not think of anything I will somehow feel refresh for 2007. But 2007 came and I still feel the same old me. Yeah "old" as in I feel tired and even scared. I have more questions now than before and it does not help that "options" are not given to us. But life, I guess, is like that. We are not given the kind of options we want but we are given the freewill to decide to be happy or not...
Right now, with all the things I have to do, I have decided to stay reserved just like before until I am able to resolve my dilemmas and maybe face the evils in my mind. But I will change... 2007 will be a turning point in my life... Give me time...
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